Story: things That are terrably wrong with your st



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Posted by Potter Fan on July 30, 2005 at 02:12 [68.201.12.32]

In Reply to: Story: Harry Potter and the Fetish Wand posted by Master Masaki on July 29, 2005 at 16:34

All the things That are terrably wrong with your story,
Written by: Potter Fan

Ok, lets start with "Draco Malfoy was just waking up when Lord Voldemort teleported into his room."

This is all wrong... one, it is apparated not teleported. two, you cannot apparate inside hogwarts, three, you write like you are 3 years old and you do not know english.

Next: "I have a magical artifact in my hand of amazing power, it is known as the Fetish wand, it can control anyone and make them do anything that your heart desires!"

Uh have you even read the books, come on have voldermort give him a goddamned spell book, you dont need a special wand to do things such as that, just need to know the spells.

Next: "Vincent Crabbe: Now why would I want to look at some stupid ass wand!?"

... Crabbe is a moron, and also would never stand up to draco... a better thing for him to have done was just grunt...

Next: "why don't we go embarrass Harry and his Girlfriend!"

Harry and hermione are not dateing, it has never been mentioned that they would or have...

Next: "Vincent Crabbe: I know! We should make Hermione wear nothing but diapers!"

once again crabbe is a moron... he couldnt have come up with that on his own...

Next: "...saying what a stinky baby. They decided to go into the woods nearby. Harry took off he..."

WTF they went into the woods, you mean the forbidden forest, which is full of dangerous and frightening creatures... you honestly think they would wander in there when there are plenty of bathrooms throughout the school...

Next: "Harry woke up to the sound of the alarm at 2:00 A.M., and he woke up Hermione"

There is no way harry could have woken up hermione, it is impossable for a boy to get into the girls dormatory due to the magical stairs...

Next: "Harry Potter: I wish for Hermione to be a normal girl again!"

...you dont wish for stuff, you have to cast a spell for it.

Next: "Harry Potter: I have to admit I have masturbated while thinking of you wetting and messing a diaper."

When the hell did he have the chance to masturbate, this was in the course of one day, most of the day he is changeing hermione's messy diaper accorrding to your story, and when he did go to sleep he is in a room with 5 other guys... sounds pretty gay to me.


Last: "Please tell me what you think about this story."

Do you really want to know, even you the author should be able to read that and say WHOA i fucking suck at writing... i should kill myself.... now take the hint.


LOVE YOU ALL, and STAY WET

Potter Fan

P.S. Maby i will get bored one of these days and show this kid how a real harry potter story is written ;)

Email: noreply@dontyoudare.com


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