How I Got to Be Me

[patspooner]

Of course I want the next chapter! That's interesting about your experience with alt.com. I've always assumed those sites were a waste of time.

[dookiebooty]

Originally Posted by Maria

Hey dookiebooty, Los Angeles can be just the same as the Bay Area. I wrote:



That wasn't one of the white pervs from the hotel bar, that was a homeboy. Around that same time in my late 30s when I was lonely after Jerry split, I also used to seek friendships by going to my older brother's parties. He is not the "halfway white-ass" that I am, he has always been classically Chicano, all his buddies are part of the same car club. So since I know what low riders like, I used to go to those parties in a pink tee shirt, no bra, tiny denim skirt with white nylon triangle, polished black shoes. You KNOW that's what those homies like to see, so they were always wanting to take me home, that's how the incident I described above took place. You would have been hot for this old gal's calzones that night.

Te cagaste eh? Nice.

Yea. Out here, it's not that uncommon to go to a "kickback" and walk up just to have the smell of shit hit you in the face.. pura mierda lol. It's just how we get down I guess . You would've loved to get a whiff of my caca chones from this weekend. And yes I would've been hot for your calzones cagados Maria lol. No aguanta nada lol.

Cuidate cagona.

[Narada]

^
Hey DB, help me out with some translations of what you were saying! I know pura mierda means "pure shit" (I think....), but I need help with the rest. Gracias.

[Narada]

Originally Posted by Maria

You would have been hot for this old gal's calzones that night.

And here I am thinking that a calzone was an Italian pastry dish! I bet plenty of guys are still hot for your canoli. LoL.

[Maria]

That's interesting about your experience with alt.com. I've always assumed those sites were a waste of time.

Like I said, this was back in the honeymoon days of Internet dating, before everyone discovered how weird it could be.

As you will see when I get around to the next installment, the fact that my inbox was full didn't necessarily lead to a good time. Lots of weirdos. I ended up arranging real-time liaisons with three guys. One became a good friend, the other ones I hope I never see or hear from again.

Any woman will end up with lots of messages in her mailbox on those sites because the men dramatically outnumber the women. The men I talked to all told me that women seldom replied to their messages. Quite truthfully, I only replied to a few people, so I can understand where the guys are coming from.

[dookiebooty]

Originally Posted by Narada

^
Hey DB, help me out with some translations of what you were saying! I know pura mierda means "pure shit" (I think....), but I need help with the rest. Gracias.

Lol no prob..

"te cagaste" means you shit.
"cagona" means shitter (kind of lol) or shitty one, or scared one depending on its usage.
"calzones/ chones cagados" means shitty underwear.

I'm cuban so i say it a little differently sometimes... "sta cagao" (that's shitty) lol.

[Narada]

^
Thanks a lot, DB!

[Maria]

And here I am thinking that a calzone was an Italian pastry dish!

Something warm and steaming inside of a very attractive package?

[patspooner]

Good one, Maria.

[UK Guy]

Hi Maria, enjoyed your story, looking forward to the next part. New member from across the pond. Used to be a member years ago, now back to see if I can find someone