Posted by Boss Pee on January 14, 2000 at 16:43
I know this belongs on the Diaper Board, but old Boss Pee figured it might be of interest to some of you all down here. So what the hell. Here's some advice from a girl:
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Hey, Katie! I'm soooo glad to hear from you. Holidays
were busy for me, too, so I totally understand why you've been out of touch. No problem. I like "talking" to you when I can. So...
>
Here's my attempt to clarify my question before. You're the first person I'm telling this to:
>
I had a hernia operation toward the end of the summer and since then I've had to wear what the hospital calls "dignity pants." This is basically nothing more than a euphamism for diapers, because that's exactly what they are, and I HATE wearing them, but I'm scared not to. (It's not like I can't
>make it to the bathroom -- I can. But every once in a while it just happens before I even know I have to go.)
>
So anyway, the thing is no one in my school knows anything about this except the nurse and my gym teacher (I'm exempt from dressing out). But there's this girl I'm totally infatuated with, and she's into me, but every time we're together I can only take it so far because I'm afraid she'll find out and I have no idea how she'll react. I can't really talk about this with anyone I know, but I'm desperate to connect with this chick.
So. Should I just be honest? Like it's no big deal? The thing is, if she told anyone I'd have to transfer schools. I'm serious. I don't care if I'm outta here in five months anyway -- five months is an eternity.
>
Anyway, I know this is a really strange thing to ask, but I can't talk about it with anyone I know. I've been trying to figure out a way to ask you this question without really telling you about my problem, which is why I made up the stuff about rehab. (I don't do drugs, although I have tried pot.)
>
If you were in her position, and there was some guy you liked and you found out he wore diapers (but only temporarily because of an operation) would this change your opinion of him? Would you keep it a secret? Or should I just give up on this girl (a thought which really depresses me).
>
Okay. Well. Fire when ready.
>
Adios.
Karl
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Hey, again, Katie. I didn't hear back from you yet (which is totally cool, I know you're busy), but I just wanted to make sure you weren't freaked by what I wrote. It's just that I have no one I can talk to about this because I don't want anyone I know to know (if that makes sense). My hope is she would be adult about it, but do you think there's a chance she might not be? Should I risk telling her? If I don't, and we never go any farther than kissing I'm worried she'll get bored and dump me.
At the same time, if I tell her and then she tells ANYONE else -- even her best friend -- I'm screwed. I know you don't know her, but if you found something like this out about someone you actually liked and cared for (because I'm sure she does), would you keep it a secret? Is that even a
possibility for most people? Help... K.
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Karl, Hi, Hi! sorry I have not written back. I am running four websites and deal with a lot of mail, plus its wayyy hard to find time to enjoy writing, and I like to enjoy writing to you.. It is not like essential.. so it is fun and
helpful and other things and I dont want to ruin that. do you know what I mean?
I can see you have been struggling with this.. It is a hard thing to go through and there is no real way to answer your question about how she will react. First of all.. people are people whether or not they are sincere and polite. They
still like to gossip and tell stories even about thier boyfriends. I love my boy to death and I still tell my best friend little odd things about him for amusement now and then (of course nothing special and serious.. but just the
funny quirks.. ect) So.. I would be very careful who you told.
You see.. I am the type of person who doesnt get wierded out by things like that. If my boy had that problem temporarily I wouldnt care and Id try to help him out.. but some people aren't as open minded as me.. and also considering you just started to get interested in eachother.. or are in the beginning stages of a relationship.. some secrets need to be held for later until you really know her range of trustworthiness.
My advice is to NOT tell her. I am not sure of how to solve the problem of wanting to be close with her, but unfortunatly if she finds out she may not want to be close with you anymore anyways. It may be sad to hear that.. but if you
were not in the situation yourself you'd see it from the otherside..
Hopefully you can find a way to wait it out until it is all over with.. but how long until you will be back to normal functioning again? The reason why I am saying this is because you wouldn't want to hurt yourself or your pride by having the never ending plague of that secret being circulated. Five more months until you are out of school (and school is the biggest rumor and gossip land you will almost ever find.)
If your secret is told.. I guarantee many people will find out and it will not easily be forgotten. I know what I am saying may be hard to hear because I certianly do not want to crush your hopes.. but think of how many times you've heard gossip like "so and so girl.. slept with mike.. you know that guy in my math class... blah blah" so you can assume that if something like that was out in the open you would get it passed around. Is there any way you can wait it out
with the girl or tell her some bogus story about how you had an operation and cannot be sexual for a few months... ect ect.. Maybe think of some wierd white lie to back up the situation of not getting close with her.. but let her know
that you want her and will be better soon??
Much luck my cutie pie.. I hope you can find a way. I think your great.. so dont worry things will get better and you'll figure it out. *kisses and smiles*