Posted by The Hawk on October 23, 2000 at 23:46
In Reply to: Help. Please help posted by Anonymous on October 23, 2000 at 23:30
First of all, there's probably better message boards and websites to look for answers to your questions. This is all about pursuing the issue of involuntary (or voluntary) wetting of one's clothing as a sexual fetish.
Having said all of that, let's examine his perspective. He feels embarassed. Possibly weak, worthless, immature, unworthy of your love. First thing I would say is to not mention it. Pretend you didn't notice, or something, no matter how obvious it was. He is in some sort of denial perhaps over his situation, or he would not have spent the night with you in the first place.
If it is too late for that ("Hey Henry, why'd you piss the bed, you sick or something?"), maybe you should make him feel, with actions more than words, that you still find him attractive, sexually and otherwise. Make him realize you still consider him a strong man, maybe it means subjugating some of your own sense of independence but if that is what you want, that might work.
Call him, talk to him, treat him as you did before this happenned (or as you would treat him after a wonderful first night of sleeping together) had his wetting incident not occurred. Avoid the topic as much as you can, do not mention buying rubber sheets for the bed or diapers for him or anything like that. Just go on as if it had never happened, but make sure he knows the depth of your feelings for him, and that you have your own weaknesses and that one of them is needing him.
Goddam, see what you get, some durn old insomniac ex-con giving you advice. I told you you're better off looking for this sort of advice elsewhere!
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