Posted by Alyssa on August 27, 2010 at 07:11 [24.152.192.13]
Thanks to everyone who responded to my question about why anyone would want to do this.... I have a much better understanding now of how this all works. You all advised me to give this a try on my own before considering doing it for my BF and I was finally free to do it earlier today because I don't work today.
I woke up this morning and I really had to go to pee badly as usual and did so, and then went about my daily routine as usual - ate and then took a shower. By this point in time I definitely had to poop, quite badly. But I didn't and still went along as usual, I got dressed and then went back into the bathroom, dried my hair, and then started doing my makeup. While I was in the middle of that I had to go badly enough that I decided this was the time to try to see if I could do it. At first, even though I felt like I was about to have an accident, nothing came out even when I pushed. It took several minutes and a lot of concentration/willpower before I could finally start to poop in my pants. I was wearing an old pair of jeans that are fitted, not too tight but not loose. It started coming out slowly and I felt the back of my pants expanding - unfortunately for me, this wasn't going to be as "solid" as I would have hoped for. I have to say doing this was one of the weirdest feelings I have ever had - it was incredibly warm and, I could tell, mushy, and the resistence of my pants/underwear to the poop coming out just felt odd. Once I got started though, I guess my body gave up on trying to resist because everything came out pretty fast. I felt my pants and there was a definite bulge back there and, looking in the mirror, it was definitely large enough to be noticeable although there was no stain or anything.
I honestly felt very embarassed after doing that, even just standing in my bathroom with nobody watching. The thought that I had just pooped in my pants, which is something that I was obviously taught never to do from childhood, was pretty crazy. It wasn't necessarily a bad feeling, it was warm and felt a bit slimy against my butt - it was more the thought of what was back there, rather than the actual feeling, that was disgusting. The stench was like a really bad, lingering fart, which was probably the most disgusting part of it to that point. Most of you seemed to advise that doing this should just be "part of the day" and casual... so I went along doing what I was doing. I finished my makeup, and then I was planning on watching TV. I figured that if I had gone this far I might as well get the "full experience" so I layed down a towel on the couch and... sat down. That was probably a very bad idea, in terms of clean-up but I figured if this was going to be anything like an "accident" thats what I had to do. The feeling of sitting down was much more pronounced than that of just pooping in my pants. It was still a bit warm so it didn't feel that bad, everything just sort of spread out and formed a cushion under me. I had sort of forgotten about the smell because I guess I got used to it, but the disgusting smell seemed to return when I did that. I stayed like that for like 15 minutes watching TV, and then decided that was enough and it was time to clean-up. I don't want to talk much about the clean-up, it was hell and by FAR the worst part of everything. I did wear gloves as someone suggested but it was still disgusting. I just trashed the underwear. I think my jeans will be OK - they had a brown stain on the back, most likely from sitting in it, but they're in the wash right now and I'm thinking it will come out.
So yeah... I did it. It wasn't fun, it didn't feel very good, and the clean-up was just as disgusting as I had imagined it would be. Like I said, the pure feeling of doing it wasn't THAT bad, but the stigma attached to pooping in your pants makes it embarassing and disgusting even so. And the clean-up, oh boy, that is not fun. But I will do it for him I think, even if it is just once, because I have a feeling it is going to drive him crazy and I've proven to myself I can handle it, even if its not something I would ever want to do on my own.
Thanks for all your advice/comments/encouragement.