Posted by Wet Trousers on May 07, 2001 at 11:42
OK, 'quiz' just means questionnaire, like my previous ones. 'Pub', short for 'public house', translates to bar in most other parts of the world. If you don't understand 'UK', I don't think that I can really help! Now, this is particularly intended for all the British posters on this Board, but people of both sexes from all parts of the world are welcome to answer: indeed, please do! The idea came from a few posts back and forth with Frodo, so he has the credit for sparking this off: thanks!
Let's set the scene. Imagine that all UK posters (and anyone else who can afford the air fare) have been invited to a drinking session in a pub with a beer garden by the River Thames. A beer garden is an area outside in the pub grounds where you can sit drinking, usually at tables, either on stone/concrete or on the grass. By the River Thames so that map-makers are not troubled by a new tributary river that they didn't know about! I guess we have to imagine that the weather is fine, because a lot of the impact would be lost in pouring rain, and it's summer (and warm - doesn't always follow in the UK!) so nobody needs or has a coat, which could be used to hide things.
The rules would be simple: two pints of beer (bitter / lager / stout etc to choice) for the men and one and a half pints for the ladies every hour; no toilet visits or undressing allowed (that rules out taking off, pulling aside, undoing and unzipping)! If this would be too much alcohol, you may have the equivalent volume of water or fruit juice every third drink. Four questions:
(1) Knowing what was going to happen, what would you wear?
(2) How long do you think that it would take before you would pee yourself (assuming a toilet visit just before starting)?
(3) How would you do it? Frodo thought that a bucket would be easiest! I opted to go down to the river side and pee my trousers standing there rather than causing a torrent from the seat in the beer garden right in front of everyone. So that it is worth doing, you are not allowed to go out of sight of the group though! For example: where you are / walk away; stand / squat; wait until involuntary / start deliberately; etc.
(4) Once you had peed yourself the first time, how frequently would you wet yourself again if you kept on drinking at the same rate?
I look forward to your answers and hope that you enjoy thinking about some of your pals on this Board wetting themselves uncontrollably in front of you! I'd really like at least one of the ladies to wear lilac trousers (any volunteers?)...
PS After the recent posts (just archived) between Dryden and Holly, I agree to fund a prize for this competition. Naturally, a bottle of champagne to be consumed at the time to add to the winner's bladder's distress (well, I have to maintain my Machiavellian reputation, you know)! ;-)))
Wet Trousers
7 May 2001
Email: wet_trousers@hotmail.com